This Guy Knocked Up Christina Aguilera
Christina Aguilera was photographed (above) leaving her hotel before the American Music Awards Sunday night, but more importantly, she was caught holding the hand of Matthew Rutler, a production...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Met Her New Man’s Mom Already
Seen here performing on Dancing With The Stars last week, Christina Aguilera met her new boyfriend Matthew Rutler's mother over the weekend presumably to inform her she's going to be a grandmother....
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Defends Divorce
Because this won't make her look guilty, Christina Aguilera agreed to an interview for the latest issue of People where she defended her divorce from Jordan Bratman, who apparently didn't talk to her...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Brings Her Concubine on Trips Now
You can tell it's a boy by the jowls. Seen above at a Japanese press conference for Burlesque this morning where she presumably fielded questions about the Cher robot mysteriously not in attendance,...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera is Moody
Despite this being her first major acting role, Christina Aguilera waltzed out to her car with an attitude last night while the rest of the cast of Burlesque made nice with the fans and signed...
View ArticleJordan Bratman Still Won’t Move Out
Despite separating months ago and Christina Aguilera more than likely carrying Matthew Rutler's baby, Jordan Bratman is still refusing to move out of their $11.5 million mansion, according to Us...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Has Sex in the Bathroom During Family Gatherings
When she's not blacking out in random celebrities' beds after showing up uninvited to their parties, Christina Aguilera has acquired a new habit of banging her boyfriend Matthew Rutler in the bathroom...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera and Boyfriend Arrested
Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend Matthew Rutler were arrested at 2:45 a.m. this morning in West Hollywood. Matthew was nailed for DUI while Christina ended up in the drunk tank for public...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Got Drunk Again At The Same Exact Place
Last week Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend Matthew Rutler were arrested after getting shit-faced at Osteria Mozza, so you'd assume they'd never show their face again. Guess again. Three days later...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Has More Leaked Photos
Christina Aguilera apparently has more racy photos floating around, except this time featuring her in bed with new boyfriend Matthew Rutler. According to RadarOnline, someone who claims they found a...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera’s Boyfriend Won’t Be Charged With DUI
After causing a media shitstorm following their arrests last month, Christina Aguilera's boyfriend Matthew Rutler will not be charged with a DUI after all. Apparently his BAC came back only .06 instead...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera’s Breasts Receive Top Gay Honor
Christina Aguilera was honored with the first star on the Hollywood Gay Walk of Fame last night despite not even being gay and successfully reproducing via heterosexual intercourse. However, she does...
View ArticleI Made Christina Aguilera Better
True story: In all my years writing the site, this is literally the first time I thought to do this. Whether that says more about Christina Aguilera or myself is entirely open for debate, but I dare...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Should Stop Wearing Tights
We are all Kelly Osbourne now. Despite being desperate for her boyfriend Matthew Rutler to make an honest woman out of her - Ignoring all that sex they had while she was still married, of course -...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera’s Boyfriend Loves Her Fat Ass
"Ho ho ho ho... ha ha ha ha.... This bounty hunter is my kind of scum. Fearless and inventive." Seen here at the Television Something or Rather promoting The Voice, Christina Aguilera apparently wanted...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera’s Fat Is Ruining ‘The Voice’
Seen here taking her son to a show that claims Michael Jackson is "immortal" yet, somehow, not a single person goes, "Child sacrifice, 'ey? Not on my watch," Christina Aguilera's weight is becoming the...
View ArticleAdam Levine’s Terrified Of Christina Aguilera
Adam Levine apparently stopped by Howard Stern this week where he essentially made it clear he does not bitch about Christina Aguilera's weight delaying production on The Voice, but instead repeatedly...
View ArticleSomeone Obviously Told Christina Aguilera Stripes Are Slimming
Christina Aguilera's weight has been a touchy subject lately to the point that Adam Levine sleeps in fear each night that he'll wake up discovering a new definition of pain and suffering as he's slowly...
View ArticleGood Morning, Christina Aguilera’s Breasts, And Other News
- Jamie Lynn Spears can legally buy alcohol now, but I'll always see her as the pig-tailed little 16-year-old with a baby in her. [TooFab] - It's Hilary Duff's baby she made with that guy she blew...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera’s The Voice of World Hunger Now. Christina Aguilera.
Presumably after never once looking at her, Yum! Brands has named Christina Aguilera as "the voice" - That happened. - of their World Hunger Relief Effort. Because if there's one thing starving...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Knows That Drinking Is Bad For The Baby, Right?
Oh, I see how it is. I take a break from the dick jokes to try and save a two-year-old fetus and suddenly I'm the bad guy here. Well, excuuuse me, Princess. [Ed. Note: I'm trying this new thing where I...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera’s Last Album Is From The Future So That’s Why No One...
"Ohmygod, I haven't eaten all day. Just one bite..." "What did you say, mama?" "Nothing!" Seen here taking her moleman/human hybrid son Max to the Pumpkin Patch because he always burrows out the best...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera & Kim Kardashian Tie For ‘Most Breastiest’ Costume
Here's Christina Aguilera and Kim Kardashian who both wore costumes showcasing their tits, so I'm not even going to come up with something clever to say about that because absolutely none of you will...
View ArticleChristina Aguilera Can Fit Into Jeans? There’s No Way That’s Right
Christina Aguilera almost exclusively wears stretchy pants or a form-hugging dress (both commando), except here she is actually wearing jeans while promoting The Voice last night. So if everyone could...
View ArticleRemember How Christina Aguilera Got Really Skinny? That’s All Over Now
Sometime around April of last year, Christina Aguilera got crazy skinny after looking perpetually pregnant for most of 2012 and almost ruining The Voice in the process. Except, good news, she is...
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