Quantcast
Channel: The Superficial - Because You're Ugly
Browsing all 25 articles
Browse latest View live

This Guy Knocked Up Christina Aguilera

Christina Aguilera was photographed (above) leaving her hotel before the American Music Awards Sunday night, but more importantly, she was caught holding the hand of Matthew Rutler, a production...

View Article


Christina Aguilera Met Her New Man’s Mom Already

Seen here performing on Dancing With The Stars last week, Christina Aguilera met her new boyfriend Matthew Rutler's mother over the weekend presumably to inform her she's going to be a grandmother....

View Article


Christina Aguilera Defends Divorce

Because this won't make her look guilty, Christina Aguilera agreed to an interview for the latest issue of People where she defended her divorce from Jordan Bratman, who apparently didn't talk to her...

View Article

Christina Aguilera Brings Her Concubine on Trips Now

You can tell it's a boy by the jowls. Seen above at a Japanese press conference for Burlesque this morning where she presumably fielded questions about the Cher robot mysteriously not in attendance,...

View Article

Christina Aguilera is Moody

Despite this being her first major acting role, Christina Aguilera waltzed out to her car with an attitude last night while the rest of the cast of Burlesque made nice with the fans and signed...

View Article


Jordan Bratman Still Won’t Move Out

Despite separating months ago and Christina Aguilera more than likely carrying Matthew Rutler's baby, Jordan Bratman is still refusing to move out of their $11.5 million mansion, according to Us...

View Article

Christina Aguilera Has Sex in the Bathroom During Family Gatherings

When she's not blacking out in random celebrities' beds after showing up uninvited to their parties, Christina Aguilera has acquired a new habit of banging her boyfriend Matthew Rutler in the bathroom...

View Article

Christina Aguilera and Boyfriend Arrested

Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend Matthew Rutler were arrested at 2:45 a.m. this morning in West Hollywood. Matthew was nailed for DUI while Christina ended up in the drunk tank for public...

View Article


Christina Aguilera Got Drunk Again At The Same Exact Place

Last week Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend Matthew Rutler were arrested after getting shit-faced at Osteria Mozza, so you'd assume they'd never show their face again. Guess again. Three days later...

View Article


Christina Aguilera Has More Leaked Photos

Christina Aguilera apparently has more racy photos floating around, except this time featuring her in bed with new boyfriend Matthew Rutler. According to RadarOnline, someone who claims they found a...

View Article

Christina Aguilera’s Boyfriend Won’t Be Charged With DUI

After causing a media shitstorm following their arrests last month, Christina Aguilera's boyfriend Matthew Rutler will not be charged with a DUI after all. Apparently his BAC came back only .06 instead...

View Article

Christina Aguilera’s Breasts Receive Top Gay Honor

Christina Aguilera was honored with the first star on the Hollywood Gay Walk of Fame last night despite not even being gay and successfully reproducing via heterosexual intercourse. However, she does...

View Article

I Made Christina Aguilera Better

True story: In all my years writing the site, this is literally the first time I thought to do this. Whether that says more about Christina Aguilera or myself is entirely open for debate, but I dare...

View Article


Christina Aguilera Should Stop Wearing Tights

We are all Kelly Osbourne now. Despite being desperate for her boyfriend Matthew Rutler to make an honest woman out of her - Ignoring all that sex they had while she was still married, of course -...

View Article

Christina Aguilera’s Boyfriend Loves Her Fat Ass

"Ho ho ho ho... ha ha ha ha.... This bounty hunter is my kind of scum. Fearless and inventive." Seen here at the Television Something or Rather promoting The Voice, Christina Aguilera apparently wanted...

View Article


Christina Aguilera’s Fat Is Ruining ‘The Voice’

Seen here taking her son to a show that claims Michael Jackson is "immortal" yet, somehow, not a single person goes, "Child sacrifice, 'ey? Not on my watch," Christina Aguilera's weight is becoming the...

View Article

Adam Levine’s Terrified Of Christina Aguilera

Adam Levine apparently stopped by Howard Stern this week where he essentially made it clear he does not bitch about Christina Aguilera's weight delaying production on The Voice, but instead repeatedly...

View Article


Someone Obviously Told Christina Aguilera Stripes Are Slimming

Christina Aguilera's weight has been a touchy subject lately to the point that Adam Levine sleeps in fear each night that he'll wake up discovering a new definition of pain and suffering as he's slowly...

View Article

Good Morning, Christina Aguilera’s Breasts, And Other News

- Jamie Lynn Spears can legally buy alcohol now, but I'll always see her as the pig-tailed little 16-year-old with a baby in her. [TooFab] - It's Hilary Duff's baby she made with that guy she blew...

View Article

Christina Aguilera’s The Voice of World Hunger Now. Christina Aguilera.

Presumably after never once looking at her, Yum! Brands has named Christina Aguilera as "the voice" - That happened. - of their World Hunger Relief Effort. Because if there's one thing starving...

View Article
Browsing all 25 articles
Browse latest View live